suicide note??

i feel like this requires an intro, i debated posting this for a few reasons, if it even matters, only like to people read this. but anyway, firstly, i am not gonna kill myself, this is just me writing and thinking, but i also am not belittling the violent act of suicide, i hope the fact that it kinda rhymes and stuff doesn't make it sound like i don't have the proper respect for people that have died at their own hands. a few people fairly closely, have made this decision, and the last thing i'd ever wanna do, is minimize what happened in any way.. well here it is
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the cold steel of a gun pressed to my skull
is nothing poetic, rather it's quite dull
but to understand the strength of one trigger pull
it's much more than the mere movement of a finger, only an inch or so
much more than the mechanics behind making the bullet go
an act such as this can be done only one way, slow
but the consequences of this, i really don't know
would it really even matter if i decided to stay?
or should i become just another dead cliche?
tryin to come up with the words to say..
this is a choice not easy to explain
i wish i knew if i'd feel any pain
not that this knowledge would make the decision easy
just wanna know if anyone really sees me
to get to this point, it must take a lot
but there's a point where it takes even more strength to stop
the hardest part for me is this very letter
how can naming people here make anything better?
to name someone in a note like this, is just bitter
you know your throwing a part of their life in the shitter
not a day will go by they won't think about this
and i just gotta say that's pretty selfish
but what else is there to do?
my heart only beats because it has to
if nothing else i'm giving my body a rest
if my heart's some kind of teacher, well i'm failing the test
but like i said i won't name a single person
i won't run the risk of making their life worsen
because of me
i've messed up enough, put my heart through the pain of three
i'm honestly amazed it's still beating, and for what cause?
but to press the button of infinite pause?
the illegality of suicide is the most insane of all laws
now i feel like these rhymes are getting quite obnoxious
i'm obviously just stalling, not sure i can accomplish this
so my final word on the subject
goodbye, and i know nobody will object..